True facts about the Mantis.
wow this is perfect
A NIGHTMARE THAT FARTED TOO AGGRESSIVELY
This is hilarious.
omfg bless this guy
actual diary entry from when i was in 5th grade oh my god
KILL IT KILL IT WITH FIRE xD
So Tolkien had a Time Machine to travel to the future to copy Harry Potter? Sure …
this makes me so angry i actually want to die
You know what you need? More dancing dwarves.
Goodnight Tumblr!
All I see is Balin checking out Fili’s ass, and Bofur checking out Kili’s
And Thorin’s just there trying to pretend he doesn’t know what’s going on behind him
THIS MADNESS MUST STOP
Best GIF I’ve seen today :D
Gentle reminder that while the dwarves have loyalty, honor, willing hearts, and all the
manlydwarfly smolder you can shake a stick at, they are collectively about as dumb as a box of bricks.#when bilbo baggins is the brains of your operation #your operation is fucked #this goes for you too thorin #yeah you caught on faster than kili #but that’s like saying you caught on faster than a concussed duck
literally crying at those tags omfg
‘that’s like saying you caught on faster than a concussed duck’
i don’t know why but this makes me want a dwarf frat boy au like i’ve never wanted anything
like fili and kili are the really adorable freshmen everybody’s vaguely worried about
and thorin is obsessed with the honour of the fraternity
and gandalf is a grad student who looks 27 or something but is actually like 45 and working on his 6th PhD and supporting himself through tutoring, growing weed, and making amateur fireworks which usually don’t blow up in people’s faces
and bofur is the only one who knows how to cook
and ori once stabbed a guy with a knitting needle during an attempted mugging
aaaaand i dk they basically kidnap bilbo who’s like an anthropology major who never has anything to do with the frats and is a hard-core member of a co-op or something
and go on a quest to win back their like engraved gold shot glass collection that was stolen by a rival frat when thorin’s grandfather was at the college
(if somebody has already written this please direct me to it asap)
You have no idea how badly I suddenly want this,
(Source: nerdoftherings)
Some nights I stay up splashing in my bathtub.
Some nights I bathe in the dark.
Some nights I wish that this water had more bubbles.
Some nights I wish I could dry off.
But I still jump in.
I still take the plunge.
Oh Lord I’m still not sure where I put my sponge.
Where is my sponge? Where is my sponge? Most nights I just use…a washcloth.
This is it boys, this is clean!
What are you dirty for?
Why don’t we wash ourselves already?
I take my tips from the Hygiene King.
Saved me from smelling obscene.
Scrub twice as hard so I’m super clean.
But here they come again to drain my tub.
That’s alright.
I found a rubber duck in my bath tonight.
Keeps Rachel wondering
who I am, who I am, who I am
Who am I
Well some nights I wish that this bath would end
Cuz I could use a shower for a change
And some nights I’m scared
The water will be too hot again
Some nights I just sink in (I just sink in)
But I still jump in.
I still take the plunge.
Oh Lord I’m still not sure where I put my sponge.
Where is my sponge? Where is my sponge? Most nights I just use…a washcloth.
So this is it. I got naked for this? Washed off all the dirt for this? I miss Andrew and Jack for this?
No.
When I see suds that’s all they are.
When I hear the faucet it sounds like a song.
Well that is it guys, bath is done!
Five minutes in and I’m bored again.
An evening of this I’m not sure if anybody understands.
This one is not for those in a hurry
Sorry but I like to take my time
Who the fuck wants to bathe alone
I’d rather have all of fun.
My heart is breaking for the water
Because now it’s gotten cold
But then I look into the shiny surface
Man you wouldn’t believe
The most amazing things
That can happen to you…
When you’re Nate Rueee-ESS-EH-EH-EHHH-ESSS. EHHH-ESS-EHHH…
The other night you wouldn’t believe
The bubbles that formed they filled me with glee
I invited you in and we both agreed
It’s for the best you wash my back
It’s for the best we take turns now
OoOoOh…
Bless this comment
there are times when i still can’t believe this site is real
This guy is a genius
ALL THE AWARDS
(Source: alltheprettygirlsonatuesdaynight)
Happy Potter, the boy who laughed
Happy Potter and the Smiling Stone
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Smiles
Happy Potter and the Comedian of Azkaban
Happy Potter and the Goblet of Giggles
Happy Potter and the Order of Puppies
Happy Potter and the Happy Bubbly Prince
Harry Potter and the Lively Hallows.
Join Happy Potter,
Hermione Giggler, and
Ron Wheezing,
in a hilarious adventure to make the Dark Lord laugh.Lord Loldemort is depressed and angry because he isn’t like Happy Potter or Albust Out Laughing Dumbledore. He is joined by a band of equally depressed Laugh Eaters, like Belowtricks LeStrange, and Losinit Malfoy.
Happy must go through many jokes and playful riddles, facing Severe Huss Snape, finding Loldemort’s mysterious Whorecruxes… Which are the only thing that can make him laugh.
Happy is joined by his ragtag team of ex-clowns, Siriusly Black, Remus Laughing, Tinks, The Wheezings, Mad-Eye Not-Moody, Kingsley Cacklebolt, and many others. Together they can save the Wizarding world from sure peril.
OHMYFUCKINGOD.
literally crying
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
/screaming XD
The BBC Has Ruined My Life: Hive Mind - Chapter 5
Hive Mind (4904 words)
by ivyblossom, belovedmuerto, consultingdepressive,moonblossom, airynothing, roane, bendingsignpost,HiddenLacuna, lifeonmars, honeybee221b
Chapters: 5/10
Fandom: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes…
When a thousand Mary Poppins came from the sky to defeat Voldemort
plot twist: the London Olympics Opening Ceremony is in fact a crack!fic
That’s not a plot twist, opening ceremonies are always crack fic.
(Source: morgrana)
Eternal Sunshine AU || Sherlock finds out that John ‘erased’ him from his memory with a new controversial procedure at Baskerville after ending their relationship. Betrayed and angry, Sherlock retaliates by undergoing the same procedure, in order to forget John. But as he begins to loose each precious memory that he and John had with one another… Sherlock immediately regrets his decision.
- - -
Looking over to Sherlock, she sighed. “You were not supposed to see this. I’m terribly sorry, and I do apologize.” Her voice seemed to give off the impression she was anything but sorry. Rather, inconvenienced.
“I want to do it.” Sherlock repeated darkly. “John erased me for a reason, and if I can’t know WHY… then I want to forget him in turn.”
Stapleton furrowed her brow, setting the telegram down, “Our files are confidential Mister Holmes… so we can’t show you any statements or consultation records.” She paused, looking back up toward Sherlock. “Suffice it to say, Doctor Watson was… not happy, and he wanted to move on. We provided that possibility. I told him once that anything was possible here. I guess he lucked out; erasing someone or something from a person’s memory is surprisingly simple.” Stapleton explained. “Given the circumstances of this particular situation… I would be willing to perform the procedure on you. If you’re sure, that is.” She clarified. “It’s still considered experimental, but then again, almost everything we do here is.” She mused.
- - -
If you’ve never seen Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind… do yourself a favour and watch it. In my Top 3 movies for sure.
(Source: dramatisecho)
I am physically unable to not reblog this
#jawn #bail me out of prison jawn
Next time the judge tells you he’ll hold you in contempt if you don’t shut up, you’ll quit being such a smartarse.
WON’T YOU, Sherlotter?
(Source: vimeo.com)
